To Push The Clouds Away

It’s been awhile since I last blogged. Honestly I have been going through a very rough patch with my depression. This week marked the 4 year anniversary of my best friend’s suicide, something I do not feel I will ever be able to heal from and something that I will blog about sometime (if I’m ever really able to bring myself to). I lost my beloved fur babies this week. I have suffered the worst cluster headaches to date, and I am finding living with my mother in law to be a difficult this to do ( however shortly, very shortly in fact we will be moving to the Florida O.C. which excites me so much.)

Since my last post I have been back and forth to Orlando to visit my friend who I have mentioned in previous posts, I have been dealing with level 10 pains , I have been trying to handle life when all I really want to do is curl into a ball and never deal with the world again.

Through this bought of depression I still forced myself to break out my makeup and Crayola my face to the heavens. For me, this is my form of meditation when the world is too much to bear. I’ve been known to have a full beat face on and still break out my makeup, wash off my face, and reapply my face if I am having a particularly bad anxiety day. Which reminds me , I will be doing a few reviews of some of the newest members of my beauty family soon as well as some posts about my face of the days.  ( you are welcome to follow me on Instagram at DaZombi3Fari3 for the most up to date face of the days)

Today I was having a not really wanting to deal with anything or anybody type day ( i pretty much have been having this type of day for the better part of 2 months now, my own little fibro groundhog’s day hell). Not even painting my face seemed to make things OK for me today. That however changed when I received an email and Instagram post from one of my top 10 favorite YouTubers  by the name of  DivaMakeupQueen.  See, I had entered a giveaway on her channel ( one that I had forgotten I participated in) to win an Urban Decay Smokey Eyeshadow Palette and today I received this beautiful little post on my Instagram …

Sometimes we just need a small little blessing to motivate us to deal with the world. This was today’s little blessing. (for me and my hubby since this was one of the palettes I asked him to buy me for my birthday and well now it’s 1 less thing he will have to hunt down.)    I know it’s a shallow thing to be grateful for but today it was the thing I needed to push the clouds away.

well , I just really wanted to pop in to say a quick hello, and give you a quick update on the mad ramblings of a makeup obsessed spoonie.   and before I close I wanted to share with you a meme my niece tagged me in on Facebook today. It was one that resonated so to the point with me.

Chilling isn’t it – that if only others could see what we feel.

Well that’s it for now spoonie darlings, Thanks for peeking in on this spoonie’s makeup bag and until next time remember to save a spoon for a little lip gloss.